Any discussion about our current polarization is guaranteed to include some commentary about how our “echo chambers” are part of the problem. Which totally makes sense. If you only listen to one set of ideas, you are much more likely to believe those ideas are correct. But, actually, I think what we have is indeed worse than pure “echo chambers.”

Listen to any partisan media – from The Daily Show to Rush Limbaugh – for a mere 10 minutes and you’ll quickly notice that opposing voices are not only not absent, but featured prominently. Hell, the entire programming model is play clip of political rival, make fun of clip, and repeat. Some of this is particularly egregious when the rival’s point is intentionally misinterpreted or when a particularly fringe rival is cast as representative of the other side. Though even when that perniciousness is absent the point is the same: the other side is so stupid so as to not even be worth trying to interpret charitably. This amounts to something far worse than an echo chamber because a consumer does rightfully¹ believe he is indeed hearing from the other side. Echo chamber? I’ve heard all those lib senators and they are idiots. This belief is surely possible because the host will always direct you to that conclusion, because the host is telling you what you want to hear.² Which is all to say that the consumer is far more sure of his rightness than he would be if he only ever heard his own side speak.

The not-actually-echo-chamber phenomenon is also weirdly true with Twitter, the place everyone is so sure is an echo chamber. The disconnect is apparent as soon as someone, inevitably, talks about how Twitter is such a “wasteland filled with hate.” This sounds fine, but it doesn’t compute. If everyone only listened to their own side, who is doing this hating? Some can be explained away as the fun of “scoring points” on the enemy. Some can also be explained by the general attraction of celebrity and the desire to stand out. But there remains the non-prominent journalists getting vicious responses to innocuous tweets like, “I’m not going to be writing an article this week.” How does a hater even find this non-trending person? They would have to, like, being following them, right? Even if you want to dismiss this all as bored people having fun by trolling, these people are necessarily being continually exposed to ideas they do not support. And unlike in the case of Rush Limbaugh, there is no host telling them why the idea is awful.

Hence my skepticism that “listening to the other side” will get us out of the current mess.

a tour.

Getting to really know someone is an undeniable path toward kinship. So we ask questions and pay attention and learn. Yet, many times words are not enough; there is something to seeing rather than merely hearing. For many matters, seeing isn’t all that possible, which makes it all the more vital to seize the opportunities when it is. As in, take the house tour, the hometown tour, the mall-where-I-met-my-first-girlfriend tour. By doing this one not only better understands another, but also gains knowledge about the world that would be otherwise unobtainable. ³

is knowing what you will regret.

For teens devoid of experience, predicting future feelings is rather challenging; highs are higher and lows are lower as a result.

With, however, wisdom and the accompanying confidence to say “I know who I am,” if you pause before making a decision, an accurate sense of what action will produce regret appears.

And just like that you have earned a remarkably robust, intelligent philosophy for a good life: anticipate regret and avoid it. 

And it is rare for sons to be like fathers; only a few are better, most are worse

There is no harm in mourning when a person dies; it is the only honor we can pay the dead – to cut our hair and drench our cheeks with tears.

So may the gods grant all your heart’s desires, a home and husband, somebody like-minded. For nothing could be better than when two live in one house, their minds in harmony, husband and wife. Their enemies jealous, their friends delighted, and they have great honor.

So you must never treat your wife too well. Do not let her know everything you know. Tell her some things, hide others.

I would prefer to be a workman, hired by a poor man on a peasant farm, than rule as king of all the dead.

We will notice errors in others that we, ourselves, commit. That’s OK. It’s also OK to point out these errors. What makes this practice far less OK is when the knowledge of your own similar failings is nonexistent.

Can you believe the hypocrisy?

Um, yea.

No, but seriously, this is crazy.

Dude, I know you really hate the other side, but how can you not see that your side does this same type of thing on a host of matters? Sure, be upset, but your indignation level should drop just a tad. And here’s a simple way to achieve that drop: start or end your first sentence with an acknowledgment that this hypocrisy you so loathe is not unique to your enemies. Maybe the degree is different. Maybe this thing your enemy did really is the worst thing ever. Still, your side does it too. I’m not even asking you to care about self-sins, just to see them. Because once you see them, the whole situation becomes a lot less obvious and your the-world-has-gone-insane act will be much harder to execute. In other words, you will see the world more clearly. 

is not an actual argument against the talking point. Tell me why the point is wrong, not who happens to utter it. If you resort to the latter tactic, I’ll safely assume that you can’t win on substance, that indeed [insert bad person] has discovered an uncomfortable truth.

The Dems are out to get Trump w/ this Corona stuff, AND it may be true that Corona is serious.

Anti-vaxxers are stupid, AND it was probably unwise to ever say anything is 100% safe.

AND

AND

AND

AND

We will automatically form preferences.

Bestowed with preferences, it’s hard to avoid feelings of need and want.

When captured by these desires, preferences demand specific path adherence for any chance at peace.

This need not be since preferences can take a more innocent form à la My vote is for Pizza Hut, but I’m happy wherever we go.

In the “innocent form,” which is possible in all matters (though more challenging the more consequential), it can be both true that you would likely be happier if the preference is met AND true that you will also be happy if it is not.

when someone repeats a “fact” so often that the legitimacy of the “fact” becomes suspect. If it’s really that obvious and true, why must you keep declaring it? 

• 2.3% of hourly wage workers earn at or below the federal minimum wage, down from 13.4% in 1979. And since hourly wage workers are only 58.3% of the workforce, this means 1.31% of workers in America earn at or below the federal minimum wage.
• About 5% of workers work two jobs.

Thanks to a tightly edited training montage in the latest action thriller, wherein the good guys GET JACKED! in preparation for conflict, a spark of motivation consumes you. In this moment, when Hollywood magic is gloriously climaxing, hydrogenated-soybean-oil-coated popcorn fingers are blissfully ignored and reality checks remain distant, you will remember how good it feels to be in shape. The mental vows start compiling. No more eating processed foods. Runs 3x weekly. EOD in the gym. Swim 1x weekly. In bed by 22:00 nightly.

By the next morning, dreams of a finely-formed abdomen are overwhelmed by memories of calloused hands, achy legs, and broccoli sandwiches; you have been in shape before and remember the accompanying pain. Suddenly, the motivation that was once so tangible has drifted into the inaccessible ether. And if you are like damn near everyone else, once bereft of that Hollywood juice, the fear of discomfort will now easily triumph over the thrill of possessing a sculpted body.

For all the incessant talk about “echo chambers,” there are, tragically, few words spent grappling with the true cause of free individuals systematically eliminating opposing voices. The oft-cited culprits – social media giants, a polarized electorate, the 24/7 news cycle, etc. – allow us to believe that 2020 is profoundly unique. In some ways this is, indeed, correct, but it’s our base instincts that permit those culprits to register at all. People today, just as all previous iterations of the species, run from pain toward pleasure. This is as true with information as it is with fitness. And it’s true even as the sprint toward instant gratification is done while knowing that a deeper, more sustainable pleasure is to be found on the other side of anguish.

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