“Do you put symbolism in your writing?”
“Not if I can help it.”
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Or they say, “I could write a book about that.” I doubt it. Writing is hard work. A clear sentence is no accident. Very few sentences come out right the first time, or even the third time. Remember this in moments of despair. If you find that writing is hard, it’s because it is hard.
Imagine a day 20 years from now when your parents are grocery shopping. They happen to run into a friend. Small talk ensues, compliments follow, and then the conversation turns to you. Think deeply about this moment and you’ll notice the lie inherent in the encouragement you will receive your entire life.
If you haven’t heard it yet, it’s coming: xxxxxxxxx, you can be whoever you want to be, do whatever you want to do. What a wonderful notion. It’s simple and totally empowering. But is it true? This act of uncovering truth is the task of a lifetime. You will be constantly bombarded by information, usually from well-intentioned people, and it will be up to you to determine what is valuable (aka true) and what is not. The better you are at this task, the better you will be navigating both yourself and the world.
Even those who claim to want advice almost certainly don’t want it. They simply want someone to listen and ask appropriate questions. Nothing more. Nothing less.
There’s a saying in the military that if you see something below standard and do nothing, then you’ve set a new standard.
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He was fond of saying that most reps had a Wizard of Oz problem: they lacked either the courage, the brain, or the heart to be successful by themselves.
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Why am I so suspicious of the newfound happiness or self-knowledge of this person about whom I claim to care? Am I truly committed to this person’s well-being, or do I miss the comfort of feeling unshakably superior? These are uncomfortable questions to ask yourself, so you might consider asking the machine instead.
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You already know what the machine will write on your arm That lie you’ve been telling yourself – you know what it is. That blind spot is not really a blind spot – you’re choosing to look away. Perhaps more to the point, you already know whether you want to see it. You already know whether you’re going to use the machine. So why are you still reading this?
For being a foreigner, Ashima is beginning to realize, is a sort of lifelong pregnancy – a perpetual wait, a constant burden, a continuous feeling out of sorts. It is an ongoing responsibility, a parenthesis in what had once been ordinary life, only to discover that that previous life has vanished, replaced by something more complicated and demanding. Like pregnancy, being a foreigner, Ashima believes, is something that elicits the same curiosity from strangers, the same combination of pity and respect.
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Quickly, simultaneously, he falls in love with Maxine, the house, and Gerald and Lydia’s manner of living, for to know her and love her is to know and love all of these things.
Some time ago one of xxxxxxxxx’s co-workers approached him in an emotional state. After a long, dramatic story, the co-worker ended with:
“Can you believe our boss said that to me?”
First consider that the co-worker probably did deserve the reprimand from the boss.
Then consider that there was some obvious advice that could be given to help the co-worker best proceed.
xxxxxxxxx’s response?
“Man, that sounds tough.”
Do you know one of your great powers? If I have a thought on something and learn that you possess an opposite thought, I first consider how I’m wrong – getting it right – instead of hunkering down in a defensive position. I strive to be like this with everyone, since I truly can learn from anyone, but it’s harder with some than others. You are in the elite group that makes me being the person I want to be easy. But that’s not the power I came here to discuss. What makes you truly special, the elite of the elite if you will, is that I feel I can learn something about myself when I’m talking with you. I cherish this.
